First off – I loved the new Selena Gomez documentary. It was uncomfortable but important. She let her imperfections show, which I’m sure was tough for her but important to help tell her story and even more to help you “feel” her story.
How can Selena Gomez feel sad?
I think this question is somewhere near the core of the documentary. You’ve seen Selena Gomez throughout her life – on Barney, on Disney Channel, through her music and acting – and it has that “Disney Glow.” You just assume that life is perfect for her. She’s famous, making loads of money, her music is successful, as are her acting ventures… but happiness escapes her at times. She’s far from perfect and seeing that is eye-opening. Mental health is important for everyone.
So vulnerable.
Selena opens her life up to showing those imperfections – and there’s no shame to them, though they are a little jarring to see. Selena crying due to sadness, Selena not wanting to get out of bed for days, Selena feeling like she’s living in the Justin Bieber relationship shadow, her inability to break-free of the Disney pre-conceptions – it’s all included. And it’s all so important to paint the entire picture.
The Justin Bieber headlines.
It’s kind of sad that one of the main take-aways for many is the fact that Selena said that breaking up with Justin Bieber was the best thing that ever happened to her. I came into work today (on a Monday) and told colleagues that they should really watch the documentary. The response I got from more than one of them was, “oh the one where she throws Bieber under the bus?” while kind of laughing. I had to explain that those are the click-bait headlines and definitely not the message I took from the documentary. When she said that breaking up with Justin is the best thing that ever happened to her (or however she worded it), how I interpreted it with context from watching was basically that she was saying that she’s happy to finally be looked at as a person, not a package. She wants to stand on her own, but for so long she was linked to Justin. That has to be extremely frustrating, especially when you have your own blossoming career – still everywhere you go people are talking about your relationship – even well after it has ended.
The Editing
Part of what made the documentary so jarring (in a good way) was the editing. There’s not a lot of “talking-head” shots where someone is talking to the camera in a room by themselves. It’s mostly just real footage, edited back-to-back-to-back. You get what appears to be an actual peek behind the curtain of the life of Selena Gomez. For the first time I could actually understand how having a Glam Squad doing your makeup for you, performing, meeting fans, and ducking paparazzi can lead to a feeling of isolation and sadness. Another BIG takeaway for me personally was Selena’s attitude towards “doing media,” that is, doing quick-hit interviews with hosts like me. More on what I learned next:
The Media
One thing that made me very sad was seeing the way media/interviewers treated Selena. She would go into interviews and it was clear that the interviewers were asking their list of pre-determined questions and sticking to them. Selena was giving answers to the questions and in many cases gave way more than you’d expect, opening herself up. To which the interviewer would respond with… their next question. In all honesty I truly believe current trends made many interviewers this way – it’s all about gimmicks and what’s flashy and what’ll look good in a 30 second clip. Not all interviewers are this way, we all know some excellent interviewers, but seeing the frustration that a lack of humanity and a lack of listening affected Selena Gomez will make me a better listener and interviewer in the future. I promise that.
Important To See
I have two teenage girls. I think this documentary is important for them to see. I watched with one of my daughters, I’ll watch with my other as well. Then I plan on having an open conversation about mental health. There’s no clear cut answers that I know of to any of this, but the open and honest conversations are very important.
Where to Stream
Apple TV
Rating
I’ll give it a solid A-. It stuck with me and has me thinking and re-thinking myself professionally and personally as a father. I can’t ask much more out of an hour and a half on my favorite chair at home.
