Brad’s wife had a baby two years ago. Before the child, she was a fitness nut and that’s what they bonded over, but since the baby she has <a href="http://“>lost all interest in being in shape. It’s been two years and she has no desire to lose her baby weight. Brad loves his wife but is no longer sexually attracted to her and doesn’t know how to talk to her about it. What is the right way to approach a topic as sensitive and your wife and whether she is going to lose her baby weight?
Ayla Brown: Good morning, Brad. I hear you have a question about weight. Oh, my goodness.
Brad: Yeah.
Ayla Brown: Here we go. Buckle up, everyone. If you’re driving to work, what is going on, Brad?
Brad: Okay, so I just kind of need to know what your audience thinks about the situation that I’m in. Okay. My wife and I are married now, and about two years ago, we just had our first baby girl. Everything’s been going really great with that. Our marriage is very healthy, so there’s really no serious issues. But the thing is, when we first met ten years ago, one of the things that really attracted me to my now wife was that she was so into fitness. She worked out a lot. She liked running in road races like 5Ks, you know, ten miles. She even tried to do a marathon at one time. And I cycle, I’m into outdoor activities too. So we got along that way very well.
Ayla Brown: You had mutual things in common and that attracted you guys to each other. Okay, cool.
Brad: 100%. Yeah. So ever since she had our baby girl, she’s put on some weight.
Ayla Brown: Naturally.
Brad: About 50 pounds. And she’s not really making any sort of effort to get back into shape. And it’s affecting me in a way where I am and I’m going to get a lot of hate for this, but I’m just not attracted to her physically.
Ayla Brown: Okay.
Brad: It’s not that I don’t love her. I love my wife dearly. She’s the mother of my baby girl and I truly, truly care about her. But I want my old wife back. I’m just being honest.
Ayla Brown: I want this to be a safe space for you like everyone who calls in. Obviously, I’m going to give you your story and then just throw it out to the phones, which I am about to do. But I guess for me, have you had any conversations with her saying that? I mean, I know this is a delicate situation, but about weight or about getting back into running? I don’t know. Have you had any conversations before?
Brad: No, it’s been very difficult to bring up because it always is. I mean, what are the two rules? Never ask a woman her age and definitely never ask her weight. So I get why this is sensitive
