What would you do if your husband suddenly decided to be the “cool dad” at your son’s fraternity and was regularly partying with him and his friends? Sonja’s husband has been going to up to visit their son at college a lot. She just found out its because he’s going up to party with him and be the “cool dad”. She doesn’t like that he’s drinking with their son, but she is hesitant to stop it because its the first time they’ve gotten along in a long time. Would you be ok with your husband partying with your college aged son?
Ayla Brown: I’m so excited to welcome Sonia, who has a very interesting question about whether or not fathers should be partying with their children. Hi, Sonia.
Sonja: Hi, guys. How are you?
Ayla Brown: I’m better than you. What’s going on with this?
Sonja: Well, I just need a little advice because I’m kind of torn here between two different scenarios. So it’s my husband who hasn’t really done much in years. He hasn’t been feeling really alive in years. He’s been going to visit our son lately in college. And, you know, he’s come back happy that, they hung out. And I thought it was great. They were bonding. They hadn’t gotten along for a few years. So it’s finally good to see them bonding. I had no problem with it until it started getting a little bit strange to me. He would be going up there for weekends, and when he would come home, he would kind of be drunk and sloppy like a college kid. And I didn’t think anything of it the first time. The second time. But then you just keep going home that way. And I asked him, what’s going on? Like, why? Why are you always like this?
Ayla Brown: Why are you drinking like a college kid right now? Are you drunk?
Sonja: He is, actually, yes. That’s exactly what he’s doing. He told me that he and our son, Bryce, have been going out to parties together, hanging out on campus together. I don’t see how that works out. This is what he’s telling me. Even going out to college parties. They hang out on campus. He gets to be the cool dad. He gets to be the fun that again, I am so against this. I just think that it’s just not good. He’s not being a good role model for our son first of all. He just way too old to be drunk with college kids now. I don’t know. Is this something I should be concerned about, or should I just be grateful that they’re getting along?
