Aidan’s elderly neighbor is the original Karen and complains about everything. Recently she brought over a present to try and make nice, but he’s convinced that she gave him poison cookies because he got violently sick after eating them. Do you think his neighbor actually gave him poison cookies or do you think he is paranoid about her?
Jonathan: We’ve got Aiden on the line with us for Panic button. And Aidan’s problem is that maybe he’s a little paranoid this Christmas season, or maybe his neighbor is actually trying to kill him.
Ayla: Oh, my gosh.
Jonathan: Hey, what’s going on, buddy?
Aidan: I have this next door neighbor, and the best way I can describe her, she is the original Karen. She will complain if I don’t bring the trash back up to my house right after the trash guys come to pick it up. She leaves notes on my door. She complained about my grass being too high last week And I had this Christmas party with ten people max, and she called the cops because it was like a two hour party. The cops showed up and they’re like… nothing’s going on.
Ayla: That’s total Karen
Jonathan: I mean, shouldn’t she get in trouble for that? If you call the cops on somebody and say they’re having a huge party and they show up and nothing’s going on, shouldn’t they get in trouble?
Aidan: That’s what I’m saying.
Jonathan: Yeah, but they didn’t, apparently, because she’s a little old lady, right?
Aidan: I don’t know. The list goes on. But then she came to me and she was like, I know we’ve been kind of fighting a little bit, and she wanted to be a better neighbor, so she made me and my family cookies.
Jonathan: Like Christmas cookies?
Aidan: Sugar cookies. Yeah, Christmas cookies. They have the sprinkles and everything on top. It was really actually cute. So we eat the cookies, and about four hours later, it was just coming out of both ends, like,
Ayla: Oh my God. Hey.
Aidan: Yeah.
Jonathan: Could you hit a target from across the room?
Ayla: He obviously had some sort of food poisoning. Right? I mean, you’re throwing up and doing, you know.
Aidan: No, I swear, she poisoned the cookies. My wife and kids also ate some of them. I think I ate more. They seem to be fine. And the kids had a stomach bug last week. My wife things maybe it’s just now I have what they had. And I’m like, No, absolutely not. But somehow this lady figured out how which cookie I was going to eat. Like she paid attention to my favorite type of cookie.
Ayla: Okay, so she personally picked out the one that was on top that she knew you would get to first and it was poisoned.
Aidan: 100%. This lady is literally crazy. She doesn’t know where to stop.
Ayla: And this could be a criminal case, though. Are you really saying there is poisoning in it.
Jonathan: And there’s no evidence left because your family ate all the cookies?
Aidan: Yeah. No. And they’re all okay. My wife’s convinced that, like I’m crazy. But I swear to you, I’m not. She’s out to get me.
Ayla: Okay.
Jonathan: Sorry to laugh, because it is actually kind of scary if it’s true.
Ayla: It is very. That’s what I’m saying.
Jonathan: How old is she? Like in her eighties?
Aidan: Yeah, I don’t know. She’s grandma.
Jonathan: She’s an old, older woman, and is trying to poison him and kill him because she’s had nothing but problems with him. And then all of a sudden, I’m kind of on his side. All of a sudden.
Ayla: My gosh.
Jonathan: She makes him a bunch of cookies and he eats them and he gets sick. Now, nobody else in his family did, but he got sick. She just gave you the cookies, right?
Aidan: Yeah.
Jonathan: Aidan thank you so much.
Aidan: Thank you.
