Xavier’s pregnant wife has been a “tyrant” during her pregnancy. And her latest demand is clam chowder from a specific restaurant on Cape Cod, which is a five hour drive round trip since they live in New Hampshire.
Jonathan: Today for panic button we have Xavier. Hey, Xavier.
Xavier: Thanks for taking the call.
Jonathan: Absolutely. Xavier. Thanks for, uh, calling in. So your problem is you don’t really like your pregnant wife. What’s going on?
Xavier: Oh, okay. Let me clarify.
Ayla: No, I want to hear a story because you need to defend yourself, my friend.
Xavier: I love my pregnant wife. I don’t like my pregnant wife.
Jonathan: Okay, I get that.
Xavier: I don’t know what it is. Ever since she got pregnant, right? This is our first kid, and I understand a woman gets pregnant. She has needs. She needs to be taken care of. She needs people to focus on her more. I get that right. But my wife has turned into an absolute tyrant, and I do not know what to do anymore.
Ayla: Okay darling. I’ll let you know if it’s tyrannical.
Jonathan: All right. So what is she doing?
Xavier: So the little things I Don’t mind. She asked me to rub her feet. Not my thing, but I get it right. Then she started to ask me to comb her hair, so she could feel beautiful. Kind of weird, I get it.
Ayla: You know, I don’t actually get that one.
Jonathan: No, I kind of get that. Is it a kind of soothing thing to have your hair brush?
Ayla: But that doesn’t mean she can’t. Okay. Keep going.
Jonathan: It’s like a soothing thing for her.
Xavier: And she wants to feel beautiful. I get that, you know. But then she started asking me because she has a very, very specific craving for clam chowder.
Ayla: Okay. The craving talk. I totally can relate to this. During my pregnancy, I was obsessed with meatball subs from a specific place, too. I tried a whole bunch of others. It was this place called Echo Mart, and it’s in Hingham. It couldn’t be from just anywhere. It was so good.
Xavier: Anyway, that’s the exact problem. She’s got a specific craving from this restaurant in Cape Cod.
Ayla: Okay, well, where do you live?
Jonathan: Do you live in Yarmouth?
Ayla: Yeah. Do you live on Cape Cod or near there?
Xavier: No. I work in Boston. We live in New Hampshire.
Ayla: Oh my gosh. Oh, Lord.
Xavier: This is like a two plus hour drive just to get to of the restaurant. Then on the way back, it’s like three hours, right? She is obsessed with this flavor. And if I don’t get it, she starts crying and bawling her eyes out. Like I’m being a bad husband.
Jonathan: Just get her clam chowder from another place and claim it’s from there.
Ayla: She’ll know.
Xavier: No no no no no.
Ayla: Any woman can relate to this conversation right now who has been pregnant and has cravings. You crave a specific thing from a specific place and it’s ungodly. The things that you go through, the hormones, the taste buds. It has to be so specific. You guys are so weird. We are so weird. But it only lasts nine months. Xavier, so how many times has she asked you to go do this? And is it really that big of a deal?
Jonathan: Are you kidding me?
Xavier: She asks like once every couple of weeks. Like it’s insane. And then she’ll ball her eyes out if I bring her clam chowder from some place close.
Jonathan: There. Oh, some disgusting place in New Hampshire. Because lord knows the clam chowder in Portsmouth can’t taste possibly as good as a clam chowder from Cape Cod.
Ayla: Also, don’t you love your wife? I mean, don’t you want to just make her happy? She’s only pregnant for nine months.
Xavier: Hey, thanks for having me. What do you think?
