Ian thinks his wife uses sex as a way to get him to buy things for her. She keeps asking him for “big ticket items” right after they make love. But is that a big deal? Is it even that uncommon? Should he care that his wife uses sex to get a nicer car or a weekend trip with her girlfriends?
Ayla Brown: And good morning, Ian. How are you? Is there. I hear there’s trouble in the bedroom?
Ian: Good morning. Well, I wouldn’t call it trouble. I just think it’s maybe communication. I think maybe that’s an issue in how things are communicated and relayed to me. It just kind of an interesting trend I’m noticing.
Ayla Brown: What’s the trend?
Ian: Well, the trend is at least we’re connecting there. You know, physically. It’s just what happens after the fact, like immediately after.
Ayla Brown: Okay. What is it?
Ian: There’s this trend developing where my wife, I love her. She’s you know, she’s my person. But she does this thing now where she seems to be asking me for things like favors after we make love.
Ayla Brown: After the deed’s been done.
Ian: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ayla Brown: What are the favors like? Honey, can you do the dishes tonight?
Ian: I wish I could say it was something kind of small, like do chores. Hey, remember to take out the trash in the morning, like that kind of thing. No, it’s getting to be like big ticket items here.
Ayla Brown: Oh, give me an example, if you don’t mind.
Ian: All right. So we’ve been saving a bit and I don’t usually get a lot of fancy things. That’s just me. And she says, Oh, I have my eyes on the Honda Civic. It’s been that way for months. But just last week, she tells me she wants to maybe have a bit of an upgrade, maybe think about an SUV she’s got her eyes on. But look at that.
Ayla Brown: Okay. Like a more expensive one. But she asked you after you guys made love.
Ian: Yes.
Ayla Brown: She’s getting your emotional weakness. You know this Ian, right? You’re catching that.
Ian: And guess what? You’re right. We’re going to get the SUV now. We’re getting that car that she wants.
Ayla Brown: We know it’s getting results for her. .
Ian: Yeah. And I mean she has a girls trip go away for, like, a three day weekend becomes a four day weekend.
Ayla Brown: And can you just say no or do you just feel like it’s a moment of weakness because you guys just made love like.
Ian: Well, I mean, I’ll tell you, the conversations seem to be pretty one sided. I don’t really have much of my vocabulary back after. I think she do most of the talking. Okay.
Ayla Brown: So what is your question for our listeners right now?
Ian: Well, aside from saving up money for these big ticket items, why do I just keep folding and folding? I want to know, is this normal? Right? Is this trend where women seem to be convincing their partners, their husbands or what have you, of a getting a little something extra after getting a little something? Is that something that is common?
